I love relationships and find the system within them so fascinating, magical, and inspiring. Though, at times, relationships can be incredibly frustrating, especially when something isn’t going as we would like it to be. This lead me to wanting to share a tip with those of you who want to actively participate in making a positive change in your relationship. This tip can work regardless of the type of relationship – friendship, intimate partner, co-worker, parent-child and so on.
You ready for it?
Focus on YOUR PART of the relationship.
That’s it. I know it is super easy to get sucked down that rabbit hole of seeing everything the other person in the relationship is or isn’t doing to meet your expectations in the relationship. But honestly, we have NO CONTROL over what the other person is or is not doing. Therefore, when you focus on what YOU ARE DOING OR NOT DOING to have the best relationship ever, things can start to change.
Shifting your focus to the good and not so good stuff you are contributing to the relationship can empower you to do something different. Now, this may take time to facilitate change in your relationship. The other person may not be too sure what is going on and may be wondering if this is a lasting change or just something you are trying out for that moment. It is important for you to keep the momentum of the change you are making regardless of how it is being received. Eventually, the other person may start to shift for the positive as well. That’s what is so cool about a system, what happens to one affects all.
Now, there are times when the positive outcome of you shifting your focus to your part may take a long time to see a positive change in your relationship. Really, only you can know how long to keep at it before you decide that the relationship is at a stalemate and decide to move forward in whatever way feels right for you. However, without changing the focus to your part, you may never know how something so simple could turn out to be so powerful. Maybe dabble with some appreciation as well and see what happens.
Make sure to subscribe! I will be posting more specifics in regards to focusing on your part when it comes to different types of relationships.